Gone phishing?

This blog includes helpful information on confidence and romance scams and how to avoid becoming a victim of online catfishing.

In November 2012, MTV released a critically acclaimed show called "Catfish" that exposed online daters   who had been misleading or pretending to be another person in order to maintain a long-term  relationship with an unsuspecting person.

Since then, we have become more aware of the many ways that people misrepresent themselves both online and in person to gain access to opportunities events, money, or people that they may not have acquired if they presented in their true identity.  

You may have heard about the "Tinder Swindler" or Ana Delvey, two notorious con-artists who posed as wealthy business moguls and defraud people out of millions of dollars. Both of these fraudsters used confidence and romance scams to lure their victims. 

Confidence and romance scams seek to gain the trust of a potential victim by using the status of a close or intimate relationship to coerce people into providing critical information, money, or resources to the perpetrator. Further, confidence and romance scams may include the promise of return or significant pay out as a way of convincing their victims to participate. 

Confidence and romance scams are illegal and should be reported to the police. 

In some cases perpetrators of online crimes like this may use pressure, threats, or authority to deceive their victims. Many individuals who all victim to a confidence or romance scam may feel too embarrassed to tell anyone or report it to the police due to the intense psychological and emotional manipulation. ​While victims of online fraud may feel shameful or blame themselves for their participation, it is important to remember that confidence and romance scams are a crime. 

People who use confidence and romance scams are skilled criminals using carefully constructed deception and intricate manipulative tactics to take advantage of the kindness, nativity, or needs of others.  Interestingly, many victims of online scams reported a willingness to participate because not only were they enticed, a trust and credibility was first established.  Many successful online scammers use elaborate operations including fake documents or piracy to convince others of their legitimacy. In fact, the Federal Bureau of Investigation indicates that convince and romance scams are the third leading online crime (even over identity theft and credit card fraud). 

However, confidence and romance scams can be easily identified if you are familiar with the methods that are used to exploit their victims.  Many sources have identified a range of techniques and typically occurring scams within this type of online fraud.  It is recommended that online users become more aware of the vulnerability and susceptibility of becoming a victim of a confidence or romance scam. 

Download the Online Dating and Relationship Safety checklist here:

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If you or someone you love is in need of mental health support or would benefit from counseling, please visit www.TherapywithRaquel.com. Raquel Buchanan is a licensed therapist in Southern California.